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Enlightenment is the Problem Not
the Solution
Question: I sent an email
to you a few months ago regarding non-duality. But, no matter what,
I still can't see this. It seems very obvious right now that all
there is, is awareness, and that this is all there ever has been.
Any thought of a person has been just that, a thought, and not a
reality. However, in seeing this, there are no feelings of peace,
and during everyday life the story continues, and so does the
suffering.
I understand that there is nothing
to find so why is there a distinction between those who get this and
those who don't? It seems that when the mind sees itself as false,
the story is automatically dropped (like the analogy of the snake
being a rope). But no matter how many times it is seen that
awareness is all there is, the story continues.
Stephen: What is your
experience when you are suffering? Exactly what is happening?
I can't find any entity here who
is suffering, can you find one there? I just find a series of
stories revolving around an imaginary character called Stephen. I
can find no one real who is suffering. I can find nothing but
imaginary characters and an imaginary story of suffering. I can find
no real suffering or no real character who suffers. I believed I was
suffering for twenty-five years, but I looked into this Stephen
character, and I looked into what I was calling suffering, and I
found nothing but imagination.
What do you find?
Q: I understand that there
is no one here just this presence of awareness, however even though
there is no real central character to these stories, when they do
come up the body responds to them creating physical pain and
resistance. I have looked countless times and see nothing but this
consciousness with a lot of pain in it which takes the joy out of
life. Maybe I am only seeing this on the surface level and it needs
to be seen on a deeper level that there is only consciousness?
S: Suffering is all
imaginary, isn't it?
If there is no story playing in
your head, can there be any suffering? You don't have to (nor can
you) get rid of the stories that are playing in your head. You just
notice that all the stories are imaginary, and all suffering is
based on the imaginary character, Daniel, who is the star of all the
stories.
There is no such thing as
suffering, no one who can suffer. There's no such thing as
enlightenment and there's no one who can be enlightened. It's all
imagination. There's nothing deeper than that.
Are you really suffering, or is
that, too, just a story playing of Daniel, the poor, suffering man?
And someday Daniel will be enlightened! It really is this simple.
Just seeing that Daniel and his suffering are imaginary. Then if the
stories continue to play in the head, to whom does it matter? Just
watch the stories—so what!
Q: I understand that
suffering is imaginary, but knowing that conceptually isn't enough,
I feel I am missing something, or I have not seen this in the right
way. This is because people who seem to finally get this seem to
immediately become very peaceful and talk about having a sense that
everything is one. And they are also able to preach this to other
people from first hand experience, where I would have to refer to
other's texts to explain this to people. Am I reading too deep into
this, or is there actually some final understanding?
S: Well, either suffering
is imaginary or it's not.
Is your suffering imaginary? Don't
agree conceptually—consider your own experience. Is there any
suffering for you when there is no imaginary story playing in your
head? Seeing that for yourself is not a conceptual
understanding—it's an experiential or non-conceptual recognition
that nothing can trouble you but imagination.
In your own direct experience you
see that if you feel you are suffering, then you know that there's a
story playing about Daniel—Daniel is not good enough, Daniel doesn't
get it, Daniel is... you know the story!
All the talk that you're hearing
from other people is part of the story that's playing in your head.
Other people get this, and I don't. Other people know that all is
one and are free of suffering, and I am not. What's wrong with me?
Look in your own experience. Is
suffering imaginary? What am I in essence? Can I really suffer, or
is that just an imaginary story playing in my head? What am I
really? Am I this simple consciousness that is watching these
stories play before me? Am I Daniel or is Daniel a character in the
play I'm watching?
Trying to improve Daniel and his
experience, trying to free Daniel of his suffering, trying to make
Daniel become enlightened, peaceful and free, hoping to get what
others seemingly have—all of that is the problem. We can say that
there is no real problem other than the solution! The solution
implies a problem that doesn't exist, and someone who can attain the
resolution to suffering, enlightenment or some other conceptual
non-sense.
All there is—check this for
yourself—is this consciousness right now, right now, right now.
Everything else is imagination. See if that's true—don't accept it
or reject it. It is this simple.
[Follow up a few days later]
Q: There was a seeing for
the first time today that consciousness is all there is! Everything
was so hilarious—the searching, the belief there was a separate
person—what a joke! It was only a temporary seeing, however, now it
is known that even though the feeling of being an individual may
come back, there is only ever consciousness! Thank you for helping
me see this.
